Part Two: NEW YORK, NEW YORK.

So raw they named it twice. Getting up at 4:00 Friday morning was not fun at all, but we had to be at the airport super early so we got our shit together like responsible adults and made it in time. The flight from Chicago to New York is less than two hours, but we made the most of it and got as much sleep as we possibly could, because god knows we weren't likely to be getting much sleep over the weekend. We were greeted at La Guardia Airport by rain. Lots of it. It looked like it was going to be a fucking horrible weekend, weatherwise. Also greeting us at La Guardia was our APB braddah Chad Hiyakumoto, who decided to make it out for the weekend, mere days after returning home and recovering from Cali and all the trade show bullshit. Our threesome now a foursome, we taxi'd into midtown Manhattan to the Doubletree Metropolitan hotel, a hookup brought to us by our boy Manny Monis, another Hawaiian in town for the weekend. The posse gets bigger! A few phone calls later and the Fatman Sean Kelling is in the hizzle to make the crew of Hawaiian heads now six deep and ready to roll to a noodle spot for some rainy weather grub downtown. After the meal, we headed over to a dope drinking spot on the LES (that's Lower East Side for you out of towners) called Motor City, where the first lady of Hawaiian skateboarding Jamie Reyes was waiting for us along with another transplanted braddah, Rhandy Tambio from In4mation. The Hawaiians are now rolling eight strong, brah! Cheeeeeee huuuuuuuuu's are now being shouted. Beers are freely flowing and shots are being done, but some of us are gonna be skating tonight at the Autumn bowl in Brooklyn, so we make some calls and try to posse up. Head back up to the hotel and grab our boards and then it's on the train over to Brooklyn where another Hawaiian meets us at the station, Andy Henry! The mad scientist is in town because he knew that NYC was the place to be this particular weekend for Hawaiians! Andy lives between New York and Los Angeles when he's not traveling the world writing articles for Transworld and injecting lab rats with god knows what. Alongside Andy at the train station is none other than Scott Johnston, another NYC resident that came from somewhere else. I swear, nobody in NYC is from there, save for a few rare locals. Me and Chad hopped in S.J.'s immaculately clean whip with Andy and were promptly shuttled to the Autumn bowl nearby while the others stopped at the store for essentials, namely brewskis. Damn, the Autumn bowl is super, super impressive. The bowl is made of birch wood, which I have never skated before, and very well-built and maintained. The pool coping is beautiful and buttery, and Andy showed us just how to pulverize it. Simply put, Andy Henry owns the place. He's a fucking bowl beast if you didn't know. Scotty J. was flexing the tranny skills as well, in case you forgot, the guy is still pro for Chocolate and has a Lakai video part dropping sometime by the end of the year. He was ripping no doubt. Me and Chad tried to get used to the bowl but it took a little while, considering how drunk we already were. After a while though it was on. Speed lines for days and super fun. There was this guy from Connecticut who was just destroying the spot, too. Homeboy just showed up and without warm up rolled up to frontside grind as well as frontside rock on the vert wall slant, which is bananas I assure you. We skated and drank until like one in the morning and then it was off to another bar, of which the name escapes me. It was a hot nuts spot, though, and there were tons of skateboard peoples in attendance. We met up with the rest of the Hawaiians like Manny, Ren, Tui, Rhandy, Lucy, and so many more heads that it was basically like we were partying at a spot back home. Local legends Keith Hufnagel and Chris Keefe were up in the spot, as well as other notable skate types such as Jack Curtin, John Igei, and Satva Leung. It was insane, basically. We rolled into the spot with all of our skateboards and gear, straight up sweaty from the bowl session, not giving a fuck style. The DJ girl let us keep our shit behind the DJ tables. Thanks, DJ chick! After that, we bounced to Max Fish, which was like the spot to bounce to every night of the trip for the late night ruckus. Bars are open until four every night of the week in NYC in case you didn't know. Outside the Fish, there was a god-send in the form of a hot dog stand manned by a half Korean, half white dude who offered up the dopest shit I saw in a long time: Kimchi Hot Dogs and Kimchi Sausages. This was eaten every night of the weekend. Made it back to the hotel at six-ish and slept until the afternoon.
Saturday was sunny! We were stoked to go skating, well, a couple of us were anyway, so we made the calls and posse'd up with Andy Henry and Sean Kelling for some street action. Kenny and Chane decided to go on a tour of every retail store in the LES with Manny and Jamie, and we would meet up with them later. Skating through the streets with Andy was a workout! The man is possessed and pushes faster than anyone I know, and in and out of crazy traffic scenarios like nothing. We took it to the world-famous Brooklyn Banks for a shred sesh on a crowded Saturday afternoon. That place is easily the most dirty and flithiest spot I have ever skated in my entire life. I'm talking stinky, smelly, shit-smeared bricks and piss everywhere and flat dead rats and shit scattered amongst all kinds of nasty shit. The bricks are no joke, either. As in rough. It was kind of crazy getting used to it, as well as dodging in between BMX assholes and other lurkers. Mainly fun, though, as we handled some shit and then bounced to the new skatepark underneath the Manhattan bridge. The park is prefab and pretty much wack, and very crowded from what I could tell, but it was the weekend too. That place wasn't all that but we were winding down the day and chilling anyway. Met up with the posse at Epstein's, a pretty famous bar where dirtbags get down. We were sitting outside at a table and we saw some kid on a skateboard almost get fucking killed by a speeding car. Right in front of our faces in fact, as Dave Ortiz from Dave's Quality Meats was yelling at us from a van with a bullhorn. Talk about trippy. It was like a movie! Back to the hotel for some Yankees/Red Sox battling on television, which was going on up in The Bronx. After the game we went back downtown and met up with more Hawaiians at some more cracking spots. They really know how to party in the city, that's for sure. Everywhere we went it was crowded as shit and totally bumping. We went to a cool spot called Lit and saw the Epicly Later'd crowd come to life, Sean and Andy's homie Leo from the movie Kids was DJing, Leo was also on my favorite show, The Wire, but his character O.D.'ed on heroin. Bummer, dude! Anyway, after Lit, we rolled to this crazy medieval wine bar, it was Italian and super dope. Our girl Lucy hooked us up with a baller ass spread of cheeses! It was awesome in there, super low key and mellow, just what we needed before heading out to the Fish again. Sure enough, we ended the night at the Fish, but after closing time this time. Sean's people's all work there, so they let us party in there after it was closed! VIP styles! We were super hammered and then this Vietnamese lady comes in selling bootleg cigarettes and shit, she was awesome, and she told us that she had a grip of bootleg porn, too, and that she'd be back with it. Sure enough, she returned, and she showed us titles such as HORSE FUCKER and THICK ASS SISTAS, all available for purchase at the low low bargain price of five dollars each. I opted for an asian one, naturally, ASIAN SWEETIES, while I got one as a gift for my man Cuzzo back home, a gangsta epic entitled HUSTLE AND BLOW. Chad came up on like six titles for twenty bucks, because he knows how to bargain and haggle. On the cab ride back to the hotel, we encountered the scariest fucking cab driver in history. He looked EXACTLY like Osama bin Laden. Turban, beard, the whole shit. And he drove like a fucking video game! It was super gnarly watching him weave in and out of the smallest traffic spaces and at complete and ludicrous speed no doubt. Chad and I had a front row seat but Kenny and Chane were kind of obscured and didn't get to see the whole experience for what it really was, terrifying! He even pulled up suuuuper close to a fellow taxi that had cut him off and pounded hard on the car while cursing in some Arabic tongue that we couldn't identify. Damn, he got us back to the hotel quick, though! For this he was generously tipped, even though he nearly made us shit ourselves. OSAMA'S BEEN DRIVIN'!!! Call it a night!
Sunday was also sunny and beautiful, but we were in no condition to skateboard or do anything even remotely physical, so we walked around midtown near our hotel and decided to take in the MOMA, (Museum Of Modern Art, ya tourist!) which was two blocks away. Wow, talk about getting cultured! The shit was awesome, and well worth the twenty bucks it cost to get in. The highlight for me was not the priceless works of art by such masters as Dali, Matisse, Pollock and Picasso, but a huge blue and yellow painting of the word OOF. I mean, Hawaiians can appreciate a good OOF, you know? Shit was epic. After the museum, we wandered around Central Park and saw some cool shit on 5th Avenue like the new Apple store, which Chad loved of course. We took it back to the hotel to get ready for our last night in town. We posse'd up at Rhandy's apartment down on Ludlow, literally thirty seconds from the Fish, where we had some beers and made Rhandy bust out his Slayer costume. Holy shit! Mike Sarpy appearance! Another Hawaiian gets up in the hizzle! We took it to the Fish and made our last night a memorable one, even though the boys assured us it was going to be a mellow one. Yeah riiiiiiight, stupes! We had a crew of over a dozen Hawaiians this time, and mad shakas and chee huuus were being thrown out left and right. Lucy even brought out her dog to party with us, which is pretty much the coolest dog I have ever seen in my life! The festivities had caught up with Kenneth, however, and he felt the need to pull the rip cord a bit early and somehow found his way into a cab for the solo ride back to the hotel and his comfy bed. The rest of us kept it going for the duration and at the end of the night, Chane, Chad and I were at the deli near our hotel pigging out and slapping In4mation stickers on NYPD cop cars! I'm talking like super, duper fucked up, not remembering shit type of drunk. So much for a mellow night.
Chad had to leave super early Monday morning, and it's a miracle that he made his flight, which is another story altogether that I don't remember the full details of, but it involves nearly puking in his mouth in front of dozens of fellow travelers at LaGuardia and the worst headache of his life. Finally got to hang out with Anton Glamb, even if it was only for an hour or so at our hotel right before we were scheduled to break out. Anton was busy all weekend with some choreography dance shit for his new music video or some shit and skating in the DC King Of New York contests, which was going on but we totally didn't even bother checking out. I passed my trusty street umbrella on to Anton for future use, and we hopped in a stretch Suburban and headed for La Guardia. On the way, the driver fucking drove up on the sidewalk and nearly hit some people, it was a perfect way to end our weekend, actually. New York is fucking wild!

Thanks to everyone who showed us ALOHA up in NYC: Sean, Rhandy, Jamie, Andy, Ren, Lucy, Lucy's dog, Manny, Sarpy, Anton, all the other Hawaiians whose names I forgot due to alcohol, Scott Johnston, Keith Hufnagel, Chris Keefe, Mark Razo, Desiree Razo, Jeff Pang, all of Sean and Andy's skate homies, Osama bin Drivin', The Kimchi Sausage guy, all street vendors of gyros, hot dogs, and all that is street meat, deli salami, Cheesesteak factory, The OOF, The African flute I bought for three bucks, Autumn bowl, Brooklyn Banks, staff at Max Fish, Lit, Epstein's, PBR, Stella Artois, Presidente', HORSE FUCKER, and last but not least the massage chairs at La Guardia Airport.

Part Three: CHICAGO, ILLINOIS REVISITED.

Upon arrival Monday afternoon back in the windy city, we were ready for one thing and one thing only. Chillin'! Recuperation was definitely on the menu for Monday night, as the three of us were absolutely bombed out and depleted, physically, mentally, and financially. That's right, I said it, financially. New York is expensive. Period. You thought Hawaii had a high cost of living? NYC can break you in more ways than you can imagine. We got some epic fried chicken and PBR and hung out at the Locster's and watched Rob Carlyon's favorite flick Army Of Darkness. Tuesday we got out and headed downtown to check out some semi-touristy shit that the city had to offer. Grant Park has some crazy architecture and apparently they are getting a skate plaza built down there and construction on it has began, however the area is so gigantic that we had no idea where to even begin to look for the site. We hung out and saw the Al Bundy Married With Children fountain, it's pretty massive. Also walked over the river that they turn green every St. Patrick's Day, the shit looked like it was green anyway, they must not need to pour a lot of dye in there come March. In the evening, we hung out at Rodan and had a little send off for Uncle Eddy, who was heading back to Hawaii in the morning. At the bar, we had our second run-in with a local hip hop character named Sharkula. Sharkula is super colorful and animated and you could say he's basically the Kool Keith of Chicago. The guy runs around town peddling his CD's and DVD's, of which Kennteth and I both partook of, and Sharkula was more than happy to spend his newfound cash money at the bar with us. We kept it semi-civilized and retreated back to the ghetto at a respectable hour. Wednesday would be my last full day in Chicago, so we got up a little bit early and went over to St. Alfred and hung out while Chane handled some managerial business. After a quick Potbelly's sandwich, we hopped on the el (that's the elevated train for us that are public transportation challenged) and headed out to the Wilson Skatepark on the northside of the city. Nice park for the most part and not too crowded. Couple of bowls, on is like a small ameoba with weird pool coping and the other is like a huge multi-faceted thing with a lot of different elements in it. Both were enclosed, which was killer, of course, and the street area was decent but contained a few "what the fuck were these guys thinking?" obstacles. Chane's homies Cuban Frank and Johnny Fonseca showed up to shred with us and we even had a Stevie Dread sighting, Hartsel's old homie from the Alva days. After the skate session we headed out to get some supplies for a barbeque that Cuban Frank and The Fonz were graciously hosting at their crib, and it was a feast for the ages I must say. Local sparkplug and skateboarding hype man Junebug rolled through to add some life to the party, and Johnny showed us his new pro model that's coming out from the newly resurrected American Dream Incorporated. You don't remember ADI? well, you youngstas won't, but peoples that have been around more than 10 years should. The boards look sick and hopefully the new ADI will prosper and Johnny will have more money to buy records and beer. Speaking of records, Johnny spun some wild 80's hits that had us open all night long, dude knows how to DJ! Couldn't get too wild though, or at least I couldn't, I had to be at the airport at 8:00 the next morning, but that didn't stop Kenneth and the Big Daddy from getting saucesippian. Home by midnight though! Good job, guys. Thursday morning crack of dawn I was up and in a cab headed for the train station (you can ride the train to and from the airport in Chicago for like 2 bucks) and made it to O'Hare in plenty of time for the lovely eight hour ride back home, which I was actually looking forward to. Don't get me wrong, it was an epic adventure, but I was pretty devastated after a week of mad carnage like that, and Kenny still had another five days left! Holy shit, I have no idea how he lasted that long, but he managed to make it back alive too.

Thanks to all that showed us love and aloha in Chicago: Big Daddy Chane Wilson, Cha-Cha, Uncle Eddy Haus, Crabby Rangoon, Henry Henzo the Brazilian hustler, Johnny The Fonz Fonseca, Cuban Frank, Junebug, Stevie Dread, Sharkula a.k.a Thigamajiggy, Uriah at Uprise Skateshop, street meat, Potbelly's sandwiches, Fried chicken in the ghetto, PBR, Old Style, Wilson Park, Sea wall, N. Milwaukee Ave., Damen Ave., North Ave., hipsters, the Great Chicago Lungfish, Ditka.....Ditka.....Bears....Bears...polish sausage...Bears...

Goodbye!